Thanks to Saint James, We Discover Miranda

Why, given our mutual disinterest in spectator sports, were we going to watch college football in Dublin? We weren’t sure. When asked I invariably offered ambiguous rationales involving vague words like “spectacle” and “absurdity” and “cheerleaders.” But Terry had bought our tickets, making us like a little boy dancing outside a locked restroom: We had to go.

Thanks to the post-pandemic crush, flights from Alicante to Ireland were easily three times the normal rate. But if we made our way to Bordeaux we could catch a flight to Dublin for under $100. That is what we decided to do.

Saving money was not the point (fuel costs probably exceeded the amount “saved” by flying from Bordeaux). The point was to visit some real estate not visible from our house.

Denise suggested we see Bilbao. “Who the hell is Bill Bao?” I asked.

“Ha Ha,” Denise said, thinking I was joking.

Sensing that I had said something stupid, I kept my response as neutral as possible.

“Why see Bill Bao?” I asked. “Is Bill Bao on the way?” I was racking my brain. For the life of me I couldn’t recall meeting anyone named Bao. And what was that name, Chinese? Korean?

“Right on the way,” Denise said. “And it has an awesome Guggenheim museum.”

Aha! Bilbao is a place! “Let’s look at a map,” I said.

Bilbao is very near the Bay of Biscay, just 75 miles west of the French border. If we avoided toll roads, the drive would take almost nine hours. Seven and a half if we took the toll route.

“San Sebastian also is supposed to be very nice,” Denise said. “Everyone says so, and it’s just a little east of Bilbao. It too is very much on the way to Bordeaux.”

I didn’t care whether we stayed at San Sebastian or Bilbao. “Why don’t you find a room at either city. I don’t care which one.”

An hour later Denise reported that San Sebastian hotels would charge at least $250 a night. Ouch! Bilbao would be cheaper, but small towns just outside the city were cheaper still.

Why, you may wonder, are hotels so expensive in San Sebastian and Bilbao?

The blame falls squarely on the shoulders of the apostle, Saint James the Great.

According to legend, St. James wandered around Spain, spreading the Good Word. He liked Spain very much but in 40 AD the Virgin Mary appeared to him on a bank of the Ebro River. She told him to go back to Jerusaleum. This advice proved costly. In 44 AD, while James was in Jerusalem, King Herod Agrippa beheaded him for heresy.

James’s head remained in Jerusalem, but his body was taken up by angels and placed in a rudderless boat made of stone. The boat floated to Spain and the body found its way to Santiago de Compostela, which is in Spain’s northwest corner.

Of course you are thinking that this entirely credible history is fascinating, but what does it have to do with the cost of lodging in San Sebastian and Bilbao?

In the Ninth Century someone discovered the remains of Saint James. A shrine was built, obviously, because that is what one does after finding the bones of a long dead saint. James is Spain’s patron saint, so his shrine became hugely popular.

People in the Middle Ages avoided fossil fuels, so they mostly walked to the Santiago shrine. The Catholic Church encouraged these pilgrimages by offering indulgences, the forgiveness of sins, to anyone making their way to James’s resting place.

Although people back then were carbon neutral, they committed all kinds of other sins, most of them probably arising from greed, lust and cultural appropriation. In fact, sinning was so popular that people were willing to walk great distances if that meant they could continue the practice. Thus the pilgrimage, known as the Camino de Santiago, became wildly successful. It remains more popular than ever, loved even by people who are not afraid of Hell, although perhaps some should be.

There are several different routes (“Caminos”). The northern Camino is a favorite, no doubt because in the summer, when most of Spain is baking under intense heat, the north is a very pleasant 70 degrees. A popular leg of that northern route begins in San Sebastian and ends in Bilbao. Every summer tens of thousands of people walk between those two cities.

That is why St. James is responsible for the high cost of lodging in Bilbao and, especially, San Sebastian.

I digress. We found a very nice hotel (“Hotel Sercotel”) in Miranda de Ebro, which by car is about an hour south of Bilbao. The cost was just under $100.

We did not know anything about Miranda de Ebro, although we deduced that the Ebro River flowed through it. The plan simply was to spend the night, get up early, and explore Bilbao. But we had time to kill so we wandered Miranda’s streets.

You will recall that the Virgin Mary chose the Ebro as a meeting place, and it is easy to see why. It is a lovely river. We looked back as we approached a bridge leading to the commercial district. This was the view:

Denise took a panoramic thirty second video standing on the bridge:

We crossed the bridge hoping to find a restaurant or café where we could get an adult beverage and food. We looked down one of the narrow streets. We couldn’t be sure, but it seemed to lead to a plaza. “Nothing ventured, nothing gained,” I said.

We walked down the street, turned a corner, and instantly smiled:

The plaza was surrounded by delightful tapas bars. We sat and drank and ate and watched old men dance with their tiny granddaughters, men with their wives, and mothers with their daughters. Even I was moved to dance, although I remained seated until the impulse passed.

In case you were wondering, we took the toll roads. The cost was not too dear, especially if you consider the toll routes generally were shorter, thus saving gas, as well as time.

I really have nothing more to say about Miranda, so I will leave you with this important message from Mitch Hedberg:

One Reply to “Thanks to Saint James, We Discover Miranda”

  1. Have been to Bilboa several times. In 1986-87 Hosted a foreign exchange student from Las Areanes, a suburb. Currently am hosting her youngest son, so he can play American Football and look at blonde girls and maybe improve his English!

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